I don’t allow anyone to treat my staff members in a disrespectful manner. I will accept slightly more abuse when it is directed at me, then I will when it is directed at my staff. This is part of building a tight knit, loyal team.
But I think it is worthwhile to separate what it means to treat people with respect, as opposed to liking someone, agreeing with them or actually respecting them.
Those three things, you have no control over and it is important to remember that. People decide whether to like, agree or respect someone on their own. You can influence that, but it is not your choice. What you can ensure is that members treat your staff in a respectful way, especially when they are on your community.
I certainly prefer that people like and respect me and my staff, but it is not something that I need to know that I am making the right choices. I’m managing the community to specific goals and standards – managing for everyone, for our niche, for our focus, for the people who appreciate what we provide. Not managing for just 1 person.
If someone doesn’t like me or respect a member of my staff, then that is their choice and I respect it, as long as they don’t treat any member of my team in a disrespectful manner. You can treat someone respectfully, even if you don’t respect them, like them or agree with them. That’s what civility is all about.
As long as a member isn’t misleading the public about moderation, treating the staff in a disrespectful manner or otherwise violating our guidelines, we’re in a good place. Whether or not they like and respect me and my staff, as long as they aren’t doing those things, everything is fine. You can’t get hung up on whether or not people like, respect and agree with you because you’ll go crazy. That’d be nice, but people don’t have to do that.
The only thing they have to do, as a member of my community, is participate in good faith, in line with my guidelines and policies. Everything else will fall into place.